Monday, December 26, 2011
Monday, December 5, 2011
Friday, December 2, 2011
don't talk about it - just be out of it
If you want to get over a problem, stop talking about it. Your mind affects your mouth, and your mouth affects your mind. It’s difficult to stop talking about a situation until you stop thinking about it. ~ Joyce Meyer
Thursday, December 1, 2011
look into my Natural journey
This is my one year Journey video- I will post another soon because that is what I love to do -I feel so excited about this hair journey - I have not given up and went back on the "creamy crack"-aka Relaxer. :)
styled daughters hair again (copycat style with my own twist or flavor
thats all folks
Mynista a.k.a. Docta Wuzdead - (My brother from the same Father )
The LYRICS Are for God's Kingdom and glory !!!!!!
Mynista a.k.a. Docta Wuzdead
DEVOTED (ft. Cory Edwards)
http://www.mynistamusic.com
(Chorus)
Here I am (I offer myself up as a living sacrifice)
Consecrated (I die again, even though I have been born twice)
Dying everyday (I die again) That I may truly live (He lives within)
Devoted (I'm devoted God's will be done, I die to self so they can see your Son)
(Verse 1)
I fly my flag at half staff, today I die again,
can't let my flesh hold me down, I spear Leviathan.
Can't let these other folks interpret God's call on me,
If it was glitter, you would see His oil all on me.
Misunderstood a lot, He told me son, you gotta' suffer,
fly with the eagles don't you peck around with them "cluckers."
So I packed it up and tied my stuff up on a stick,
Hung it over my shoulder, and let my journey commence...
One foot in front of the other, beside my sisters and brothers,
all of us come from the gutter, we were all in sin.
No one was innocent, a sacrificial Lamb was sent,
It was never in the plan of God to damn us men.
It was more like the homie Romeo's banishment,
but He loved us so much He sent His Lamb in.
And He aint dead either, Jesus alive!
I die to self...
(Chorus)
(Verse 2)
If this song don't get no radio play I don't care,
If they don't like the way I praise, then "oh well."
'Cause I aint making music for no trophies or no fame,
I shall not bypass my heart to get into their game.
I got your call on me, I recognize grace,
strengthen my inner man, I'm running my race.
And when I'm feeling faint, I aint going back,
I'm gonna wait upon you 'til I get my "strong back."
Sometimes I wish I could eject up out a fiery trial,
but I know you're with me, you will not forsake your child.
So when I'm persecuted, my flesh I'm gonna' mute it,
I'm rooted in the love of Jesus and I'm gonna use it.
Offense I will excuse it, I'm praying for my brother,
even though we aint really felling each other.
So here I am again, what can I do for You,
who can I love?...
(Chorus)
(Verse 3)
I tie myself up on the altar of your will God,
brand me with your fired up seal God.
Anoint me with your power, equip me for your service,
use me according to your pre-planned purpose.
I'm your worker, I'm your slave, put your chains on me,
I don't want no civilian clothes to remain on me.
I got your manual, I got Emmanuel,
illuminate my understanding to see very well.
I know the gates of Hell will never prevail against me,
'cause I'm in the Church, so I'm fenced (yeah).
'Umma do my part, and get my mind straight,
meditate upon your Word with my eye gate.
I'm listenin, I'm looking for ya', yeah I'm seeking You,
A living sacrifice, a sweet aroma pleasing You.
I only live once, that's why I gotta die,
no longer "I."...
(Chorus Out)
Not a Perfect soul on this earth
I have been redeemed
yeah I made mistakes
when I think it may have been to many
for the most the mistakes of the mouth
Hurtful words has come out to someone who did not deserve to hear the words
I tell my heavenly father I am sorry and ask Him for his help daily
this is how I want to be Daddy
Help me keep the words of kindness upon my mouth
no matter how someone roll their eyes at me
or may have said a smart mouth remark to me
I am growing
yeah I am grown
and I know I am 29 but that does not mean immaturity of my growing can't hit my mind
When I am 30 I will only see that I made a whole decade of my life but there is still more time left
I want to grow old with a smile of kindness and generosity but that doesn't mean I want to be someone who gets used , talked about , abused and stepped on
I know this wish is possible because my God said in his Word that the impossible can be made possible
so with all the troubled thoughts that cross my mind of how someone can be mean and green towards me, I always know to hold on and to carry the Light Of Love and know who Loves me and that is a much better thought to help me get through
I love you Lord , you help me write for your purpose and not to hurt another human's feeling just cause my heart is easily broken
and I am not sure if I should write more but I will leave it here for now
My favorite pic of my daughter and I at the beautiful place (Great Falls, Va) the Journey of hiking is hard and rough- sometimes you can get lost on a path if you loose track of directions but the scenery of God always brings you back to reality that there is a purpose and God always completes that
yeah I made mistakes
when I think it may have been to many
for the most the mistakes of the mouth
Hurtful words has come out to someone who did not deserve to hear the words
I tell my heavenly father I am sorry and ask Him for his help daily
this is how I want to be Daddy
Help me keep the words of kindness upon my mouth
no matter how someone roll their eyes at me
or may have said a smart mouth remark to me
I am growing
yeah I am grown
and I know I am 29 but that does not mean immaturity of my growing can't hit my mind
When I am 30 I will only see that I made a whole decade of my life but there is still more time left
I want to grow old with a smile of kindness and generosity but that doesn't mean I want to be someone who gets used , talked about , abused and stepped on
I know this wish is possible because my God said in his Word that the impossible can be made possible
so with all the troubled thoughts that cross my mind of how someone can be mean and green towards me, I always know to hold on and to carry the Light Of Love and know who Loves me and that is a much better thought to help me get through
I love you Lord , you help me write for your purpose and not to hurt another human's feeling just cause my heart is easily broken
and I am not sure if I should write more but I will leave it here for now
Celebrate Someone!
Nothing is more important than words. In fact, my favorite invention on earth is the alphabet. Where would we be without it? Don't hesitate to say words that build up and strengthen someone. Applaud others with kind words. And put them in writing to be kept and cherished.
If you want to make someone happy, figure out how to say thank you in a fresh, loving way.
- Send a card.
- Write a warm, tender e-mail.
- Communicate the good news instead of the bad.
- Mail a postcard or a letter.
- Send someone you love a detailed description of everything going on in the neighborhood.
- Tell someone what you love and miss about them.
That is so cool. I often wonder how will I turn out when I become older, I am 29 years old and love to encourage people. Sometimes opportunities slip away.
Last week I sent an friendly email but I received no responses, I wonder is that the way some people say " Leave me alone"
If I don't respond, that means "tough cookie, I don't care about you, your life,encouraging words, I don't even want you to purchase a gift for me. I am no longer your friend, although I made the mistake of accepting you as a friend on Facebook but you are on there with a whole lot of other random folks I care nothing about. "
The above I written are just thoughts that I wonder of what might be on people's mind when they reject a text message, an email , an phone call. "you are not important to me so I don't have to explain anything to you"
Maybe this is how my unknown earthly father feels " aww the baby girl who I nicknamed Cricket is not important to me but I hope she is having a good life and is not looking for me"
Maybe this is how my unknown earthly father feels " aww the baby girl who I nicknamed Cricket is not important to me but I hope she is having a good life and is not looking for me"
Since these are my thoughts when cluttered with of what people may think of me then I know I need to not stay there but rise and keep moving forward because I know God places me right where he wants me and places awesome and great people around me who does love me and don't mind the sharing stories of my life via the web of Facebook,twitter or e-mail.
There are folks who say " Hey call me, text me its OK, like to hear from you to know how you are doing in life "
There are folks who say " Hey call me, text me its OK, like to hear from you to know how you are doing in life "
and with folks like that how can I not return unto them the same generosity and kindness and that is just how life goes on.
Just Love to Love - it really does feels good when someone loves you back ~ Stella's Mindset
on the Journey of staying positive daily
on the Journey of staying positive daily
Searching for Birth Dad
Why do I want to know him ? When I don't need anything now, I am grown married wife and mother of three delightful children.
you know a real father and daughter relationship with the man who had also never knew or planned for me but had a part in bringing me in this world.
I am not sitting here giving credit to the man (Richard J Woodward ) because I am a firm believer in the man upstairs , some know Him as God, but I call him daddy daily (Jesus)
Facts that I know
He was in the U.S. Army and he once lived in Fort Bragg NC - still could be there or in the surrounding area.
( heard he was a married man, so I am assuming he had a family with children
I often wonder if he ever remembers that he had me and if he would like to meet me and see how I turned out in this life.
Well my best feature is my smile. If he ever reads this blog or perhaps his family members. I hope they let him know
Father Known Name: Richard Joseph Woodard Sr
Last Known Employment: US Army
Since I was born in 1982 - that is probably the area he could of remained but not sure of his hometown and where he is from
you know a real father and daughter relationship with the man who had also never knew or planned for me but had a part in bringing me in this world.
I am not sitting here giving credit to the man (Richard J Woodward ) because I am a firm believer in the man upstairs , some know Him as God, but I call him daddy daily (Jesus)
Facts that I know
He was in the U.S. Army and he once lived in Fort Bragg NC - still could be there or in the surrounding area.
( heard he was a married man, so I am assuming he had a family with children
I often wonder if he ever remembers that he had me and if he would like to meet me and see how I turned out in this life.
Well my best feature is my smile. If he ever reads this blog or perhaps his family members. I hope they let him know
Father Known Name: Richard Joseph Woodard Sr
Last Known Employment: US Army
Since I was born in 1982 - that is probably the area he could of remained but not sure of his hometown and where he is from
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Love to Love my daughters hairstyles
Diva Locks (Diva Do's & Everything In Between): Style of the Day
Diva Locks (Diva Do's & Everything In Between): Style of the Day: So I saw this style over at http://www.shaunellshair.blogsot.com/ and I wanted to try it on the diva. So I did and I changed it up a bit an...
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Friday, November 18, 2011
Biracial Hair by Zora Howard
I have bi-racial hair
Pantene Pro-V waves on the top
Easy to style, comb, rock-
Until-I encounter my naps,
I’m not talking about those-cute detangle with the spray naps.
I’m talking about those, slave naps, like,
No comb, brush, or man can handle the kind of naps I got- like,
No way you are touching my hair-naps like
Back 10 feet up, or we can dance naps
Those naps like-
DAMN!
I have bi-racial hair,
Those smooth and silk rafts hanging all through my mane,
Until you get to the back, and encounter the jungle, in which you can find Tarzan and Jane.
In the front you forget and relax in the pleasure,
Until you get to the back and remember pain
Baby hair slicked back with that good 4 dollar pomade,
That goes with roots and tangles,
Soaked with that same olive oil; mixed with that spaghetti sauce momade.
I have bi-racial hair,
Combs run freely through my fine breezy, just to the part, the most you can make,
Until it gets to the back and
Breaks.
I have bi-racial hair
Like-
The only thing my mother could put it in was 2 big braids,
And sometimes that was to much,
So she left half undone.
I was in the mirror, I was in the mirror,
Convincing my self I looked just like a dark-skinned Alicia Keys
I have bi-racial hair,
because I have bi-racial blood.
I’m not talking about that-cute they met then fell in love, blood
I’m talking about that- slaved raped six times by the master,
Birthing 6 mixed babies, later hung blood
I’m talking about that cross burning in the mud, blood
And you call me a mud blood,
Slit my rist,
my blood does not excrete in black and white.
I drean in verse and in red
Like what drained from Emmit Tills’ lips when he was killed for breaking down color lines
Bi-racial who surcomes to the abuse from her peers in her middle school,
Those whose who constantly called me an Oreo
Well she’s not white, its more like Reese’s cookie, mixed breed or a mullato
That’s what it is a reverse mulatto
I AM NOT A FUCKING COOKIE OR A BITCH!
My roots are deep too
my bi-racial roots are not blind
or more than cotton soft
cause my blood were in the sun, picking cotton too
a thousand times discrated for my race
a thousand time discrated from my history y'all never get
let textbooks be your truth
and sprinkle the ashes of your history into streams
i dream for a time and place where
maybe y'all all accept me
maybe we need to wake up again and remember a morning of you
like something new
baby I'll be green cause my people drove there
you people drove me there
with my tender heart
tender head
Pantene Pro-V waves on the top
Easy to style, comb, rock-
Until-I encounter my naps,
I’m not talking about those-cute detangle with the spray naps.
I’m talking about those, slave naps, like,
No comb, brush, or man can handle the kind of naps I got- like,
No way you are touching my hair-naps like
Back 10 feet up, or we can dance naps
Those naps like-
DAMN!
I have bi-racial hair,
Those smooth and silk rafts hanging all through my mane,
Until you get to the back, and encounter the jungle, in which you can find Tarzan and Jane.
In the front you forget and relax in the pleasure,
Until you get to the back and remember pain
Baby hair slicked back with that good 4 dollar pomade,
That goes with roots and tangles,
Soaked with that same olive oil; mixed with that spaghetti sauce momade.
I have bi-racial hair,
Combs run freely through my fine breezy, just to the part, the most you can make,
Until it gets to the back and
Breaks.
I have bi-racial hair
Like-
The only thing my mother could put it in was 2 big braids,
And sometimes that was to much,
So she left half undone.
I was in the mirror, I was in the mirror,
Convincing my self I looked just like a dark-skinned Alicia Keys
I have bi-racial hair,
because I have bi-racial blood.
I’m not talking about that-cute they met then fell in love, blood
I’m talking about that- slaved raped six times by the master,
Birthing 6 mixed babies, later hung blood
I’m talking about that cross burning in the mud, blood
And you call me a mud blood,
Slit my rist,
my blood does not excrete in black and white.
I drean in verse and in red
Like what drained from Emmit Tills’ lips when he was killed for breaking down color lines
Bi-racial who surcomes to the abuse from her peers in her middle school,
Those whose who constantly called me an Oreo
Well she’s not white, its more like Reese’s cookie, mixed breed or a mullato
That’s what it is a reverse mulatto
I AM NOT A FUCKING COOKIE OR A BITCH!
My roots are deep too
my bi-racial roots are not blind
or more than cotton soft
cause my blood were in the sun, picking cotton too
a thousand times discrated for my race
a thousand time discrated from my history y'all never get
let textbooks be your truth
and sprinkle the ashes of your history into streams
i dream for a time and place where
maybe y'all all accept me
maybe we need to wake up again and remember a morning of you
like something new
baby I'll be green cause my people drove there
you people drove me there
with my tender heart
tender head
Dare to Love
The heart is more deceitful than all else and it always pursue that which feels right at the moment
Scornful - Word of the week
The truly happy person
doesn’t follow wicked advice,
doesn’t stand on the road of sinners,
and doesn’t sit with the disrespectful----<--- I have seen where not to be seated this week - its always been there - my eyes opened up to much understanding of the word (SCORNFUL) my personal word of the Week- it means "know it all" -God help me to not be scornful and when I See it in others around - strengthen me to encourage and love them anyway-but do not allow me to sit with them in being scornful - I love you Lord
doesn’t follow wicked advice,
doesn’t stand on the road of sinners,
and doesn’t sit with the disrespectful----<--- I have seen where not to be seated this week - its always been there - my eyes opened up to much understanding of the word (SCORNFUL) my personal word of the Week- it means "know it all" -God help me to not be scornful and when I See it in others around - strengthen me to encourage and love them anyway-but do not allow me to sit with them in being scornful - I love you Lord
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
WrapWorldWide.Com - Mynista's Blog: Ghost On Deck [The Official Music Video]
WrapWorldWide.Com - Mynista's Blog: Ghost On Deck [The Official Music Video]: [For best quality click 720p to view in HD] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HbI4FBU-oyM&hd=1 (Via Youtube) http://www.vimeo.com/18610467 (...
WrapWorldWide.Com - Mynista's Blog: Ghost On Deck [The Official Music Video]
WrapWorldWide.Com - Mynista's Blog: Ghost On Deck [The Official Music Video]: [For best quality click 720p to view in HD] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HbI4FBU-oyM&hd=1 (Via Youtube) http://www.vimeo.com/18610467 (...
Monday, November 7, 2011
STRUT! The Magazine: Dilly Dally or STRUT!
STRUT! The Magazine: Dilly Dally or STRUT!: You can choose to drag your feet and dawdle through life… or you can be flamboyant, ostentatious and vivacious. In my case, I embellish e...
STRUT! The Magazine: STRUT!
STRUT! The Magazine: STRUT!: It is with Great Excitement that I introduce to you STRUT! The Magazine. This print magazine which will feature stories about women who walk...
Friday, July 15, 2011
RAP for JESUS
To be a survivor in this Amazing Race with the need for speed you need God’s Grace and if your desperate like housewives watching days of our lives, you can’t cope without hope and that is not on a soap. If your looking to Oprah or Dr. Phil you can shop non-stop or pop a pill, but the void won’t fill and the pain won’t kill until you love the one that hung on a hill. Kicking back in your lazy boy easy chair watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, nah your not gonna find it there. No American Idol or Council Tribal has the final answer that will satisfy ya. C. S. I. ain’t got a clue. S.V.U. Don’t know what to do Not the E R or those seen on a CD TV DVD or MP3 can save you and me. CNN has got no Good News here’s a headline you must choose. It’s not a simple life Paris Hilton, It’s treading on thin ice living in sin. You can be an apprentice for Donald Trump or eat Fear Factor fast food from a dump you can be a heavy hitter or wheel of fortune winner or a Fox news no spin spinner or flat sinner but you better check this life that your livin’ and make sure your sins are forgiven I bet cha 50 cent Elvis done come and went, and eventually every Black-eyed-pea, Gwen Stefani, P-Diddy and Britney. Every wanna-be on M T V with their Icy Bling, every Dixie Chick that Sings, they all gonna see the king of kings. I don’t care if your J-Lo, Leno or Bono. One thing you gotta know. Some day your gonna die, Bro. Then Where are you gonna go. Hey, i’m not talking some punk junk that is irrelevant. Like your Grandma’s church from way back when. It’s not some preacher feature on T B N. that you need to be liking or listening. The real superstar is Jesus Christ. He’s the way, the truth and the life. One day he’s gonna split the sky. He is the brightest light and the highest high and so what I came to say and what I’m telling you is don’t buy that stupid stuff they be selling ya it’s all designed to fill your head and waste your space until your dead here’s the bottom line in my rhyme. Give your life to God while there is still time.
Wednesday with Beth Moore
Everytime this woman speaks -no matter what day it is - SHE is speaking to me - God is speaking through this woman because her relationship with God is deep- I am telling ya - my situation with letting someone who intimidated me on Saturday and I allowed that thing to play over and over in my head - is A STRONGHOLD - it paralyze me to not want to eat the fruit of His Word right- I am in the army of the Lord but definitely in Basic training being built up through Him and for Him so one day I can be in the battlefield.....
Pray for me
http://youtu.be/F53HrbtGCC0
There is so much secrecy in christianity - we don't want to tell anything to anyone and where we are hurting
God has not given us the spirit of fear -
The natural mind will think on what will harm us and it becomes higher and higher in our thoughts which is developing a StrongHold -
if someone puts me down and I replay that ( i become a prisoner of my bad thoughts)
GOD can totally crush it - break down the chains
1 me
there is only 1 me, just like there was only group named Run DMC, no duplicate of me because that was not the plan of God, yes reality stars show how they succeed and no 1 can jock their sneeze but I can do the same and turn off the screen tv-to get down with my dreams so I can see my own reality of blessings from the King
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Silence
Silence is beginning to be foreign to us more and more by the day
Silence always meant a lot to me
As much I can see
If we listen more to one another
We will definitely find that peace
God enjoys us when we listen to Him
Staying focused on him helps Him
Get through to us
So he can help us win
“Silence is golden” is all so clear
I can see the point of twitter is to make that quote die someday near
When I turn off everything, my mind feels saner, because I can decipher thoughts bad from good
because I cried out so many times " God Why God Why" ? and that all the times he would try to answer
I Was still whining
now I am the point in my growing to know
God heard me all along
Saturday, July 9, 2011
Dont Abuse your Apologies
you ever felt like I felt
always wanted to be nice and appease everyone
well guess what, the newsflash is you cant always make people happy
that is not how the world works
I just learned that I need to stop apologizing for everything and I have been told before about my over explaining stuff. Somethings are not that serious - quoted by a few I love and respect. Well its not if you tell someone you can not do something today, that is what it is. you can't. Everything dont need an explanation. but if you are a person like myself who hate saying no,then its never to late to start so begin with me , open your mouth and say N O ! its does not have come out as if you are yelling or sound sarcastic or anything. The word no gets overlooked ,you ever had a salesperson try every line in the book to get you to buy something, well its their job to not take No for an aswer and the same for person collecting bills. you know who else says no and I can tell you why its not a SIN . Our Father which art in Heaven , yes GOD. I am just writing to bring life to my writing. The way I write is the way I like to read. I am a humorous person who loves humerous people. I guess it came from the first comedian tv show I love to rewatch a repeat anyday and that is BILL COSBY, he speaks the truth with the humerous exagerations at times. I am tickeled right now thinking of the jokes and lines that came out of his mouth. So anyways I am off thought of what I wanted to say. I am going to take a break and continue later.
always wanted to be nice and appease everyone
well guess what, the newsflash is you cant always make people happy
that is not how the world works
I just learned that I need to stop apologizing for everything and I have been told before about my over explaining stuff. Somethings are not that serious - quoted by a few I love and respect. Well its not if you tell someone you can not do something today, that is what it is. you can't. Everything dont need an explanation. but if you are a person like myself who hate saying no,then its never to late to start so begin with me , open your mouth and say N O ! its does not have come out as if you are yelling or sound sarcastic or anything. The word no gets overlooked ,you ever had a salesperson try every line in the book to get you to buy something, well its their job to not take No for an aswer and the same for person collecting bills. you know who else says no and I can tell you why its not a SIN . Our Father which art in Heaven , yes GOD. I am just writing to bring life to my writing. The way I write is the way I like to read. I am a humorous person who loves humerous people. I guess it came from the first comedian tv show I love to rewatch a repeat anyday and that is BILL COSBY, he speaks the truth with the humerous exagerations at times. I am tickeled right now thinking of the jokes and lines that came out of his mouth. So anyways I am off thought of what I wanted to say. I am going to take a break and continue later.
Friday, July 8, 2011
SPOT'LIKE' via FREEDOMINK: BRANDON BOSTON
SPOT'LIKE' via FREEDOMINK: BRANDON BOSTON: "KEEPING IT R.E.A.L STANDING JUST LIKE ANY OTHER MAN HIS STATURE IS AVERAGE SO IT SEEMS, BUT WHAT SET'S BRANDON APART FROM THE CROWD IS HIS..."
Thursday, April 7, 2011
have you ever
Oh my God
so I was having a conversation today with someone and the person said Cristella, you don't let people talk or get a word when in when someone is a disagreement with you. You don't realize that you may hurt people feelings and that one situation a few months ago, you spoke so badly the person was in tears, I was shook, and I was blown because that is not at all how I want to come off to people
I want to be that quick listener and great educated - street smart speaker that can speak with sense and sensibility and sensitivity.
I have been a jerk in situations where I felt like I have never spoken up for myself and I admit I might of hurt some feelings . But my intentions and my heart was really not to do so. People alway say some things are better left unsaid than said. And I wonder why? because I missed out on a pass of letting someone have in when I was a child or while in middle to high school.
I do get offended when someone plays tattle tale to get someone fired or written up. When someone plays " follows the rules" or if you don't I will tell on you and make sure I cover myself and not care about you loosing you hard earned income.
God made me to Love like he does for me, sometimes it seems so hard because people can be mean, and when I say people I must confess mean is me. Being mean is nice and it can come from a numerous of things
I apologize to everyone who can even think or remember being a non listening asshole who does not deserve a friendship that is as genuine
My mouth needs some work
I am praying to gain strength so that I dont a hurt another human being especially beginning at home with my husband and kids....its a process...never said I am perfect...just want to say the right things, treat others with respect and be right
so I was having a conversation today with someone and the person said Cristella, you don't let people talk or get a word when in when someone is a disagreement with you. You don't realize that you may hurt people feelings and that one situation a few months ago, you spoke so badly the person was in tears, I was shook, and I was blown because that is not at all how I want to come off to people
I want to be that quick listener and great educated - street smart speaker that can speak with sense and sensibility and sensitivity.
I have been a jerk in situations where I felt like I have never spoken up for myself and I admit I might of hurt some feelings . But my intentions and my heart was really not to do so. People alway say some things are better left unsaid than said. And I wonder why? because I missed out on a pass of letting someone have in when I was a child or while in middle to high school.
I do get offended when someone plays tattle tale to get someone fired or written up. When someone plays " follows the rules" or if you don't I will tell on you and make sure I cover myself and not care about you loosing you hard earned income.
God made me to Love like he does for me, sometimes it seems so hard because people can be mean, and when I say people I must confess mean is me. Being mean is nice and it can come from a numerous of things
I apologize to everyone who can even think or remember being a non listening asshole who does not deserve a friendship that is as genuine
My mouth needs some work
I am praying to gain strength so that I dont a hurt another human being especially beginning at home with my husband and kids....its a process...never said I am perfect...just want to say the right things, treat others with respect and be right
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Martha I miss ya always
Today I am thinking of Martha my younger sis , she meant alot to me , my first lil sis , remembers when she came home from the hospital when she was born or the thought that wen through my head when I found out she would be a special needs child and we will pay careful attention to her development growth because of something called Down Syndrome...never knew that it was going to blow me and the time she turned 18 she was diagnosed with something called leukemia, my brother James and I knew to get to google and we found that other down syndrome children grew with it and the stories for their testimonies was it was harmony for them to know that their families with down syndrome had leukemia and lived but I had a hope , I said My lil sis will be ok ,she wont let nothing stop her cause she loved to rock back and forth to beautiful music that spoke about Jesus...She was our music dance fan, she helped us get into our music groove and rejoice with a dance no matter how the roads of life was going...
I thank Lord for bring her in my life cause she taught me about peace with Jesus and rejoicing in the Lord no matter what the storm that goes
I just ask the Lord for Peace because I am missing you little sis
I must keep Reading
I must keep reading
when I read I feel free
my kids begin to mock me
and find this love for words just like me
I love to read
I remember when I first begin to read
i must of red my first novel over and over
now that I am grown
i can't get enough of that self help book
with spirituality and knowing the difference between being religious with tradition and a true solid relationship with the Lord
Learning and yearning for scripture to feel up my soul and heart for every hole that is there , it needs to be filled with God's loving words for me to stay strong and to always hold on
I Miss ya
Today I am thinking of Martha my younger sis , she meant alot to me , my first lil sis , remember when she came home from the hospital when she was born or the thought that wen through my head when I found out she would be a special needs child and we will pay careful attention to her development growth because of something called Down Syndrome...never knew that it was going to blow me and the time she turned 18 she was diagnosed with something called leukemia, my brother James and I knew to get to google and we found that other down syndrome children grew with it and the stories for their testimonies was it was harmony for them to know that their families with down syndrome had leukemia and lived but I had a hope , I said My lil sis will be ok ,she wont let nothing stop her cause she loved to rock back and forth to beautiful music that spoke about Jesus...She was our music dance fan, she helped us get into our music groove and rejoice with a dance no matter how the roads of life was going...
I thank Lord for bring her in my life cause she taught me about peace with Jesus and rejoicing in the Lord no matter what the storm that goes
I just ask the Lord for Peace because I am missing you little sis
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Beginning thoughts of me
just very encouraged by some of you write who write poetry , i just started to draft up some words of my own , Poetry is my favorite thing to read and I use to write back when I was like 13 but has slipped away
bare with me and give me your thoughts
I am working on some things as God give me the words to type
This is what I thought beauty meant to me as I was younger
I thought I was ugly cause my eyes were dark brown, my bottom and bosom weren't big and round
when I was a girl -I thought beauty was outer importance more than anything
so eager to straighten my hair,would sit in a chair and imagine everything
wondered if my skirt that appeared so long took away the beauty that I wanted others to see....if the skirt was shorter would people really like me , wished the hair was longer like the women on tv-my bosom was premature and undeveloped from age 13 to 16
wondered if I would see beauty because boys preferred to see booty instead of me ...so that left me wandering and desiring
what beauty should mean to me.
As i grew God began to show me that showing low self esteem was no good for me, i had to understand that character of a person is how you should see beauty and not worry about the outer parts that determined extreme reality tv
bare with me and give me your thoughts
I am working on some things as God give me the words to type
This is what I thought beauty meant to me as I was younger
I thought I was ugly cause my eyes were dark brown, my bottom and bosom weren't big and round
when I was a girl -I thought beauty was outer importance more than anything
so eager to straighten my hair,would sit in a chair and imagine everything
wondered if my skirt that appeared so long took away the beauty that I wanted others to see....if the skirt was shorter would people really like me , wished the hair was longer like the women on tv-my bosom was premature and undeveloped from age 13 to 16
wondered if I would see beauty because boys preferred to see booty instead of me ...so that left me wandering and desiring
what beauty should mean to me.
As i grew God began to show me that showing low self esteem was no good for me, i had to understand that character of a person is how you should see beauty and not worry about the outer parts that determined extreme reality tv
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